Daughters of Nantucket by Julie Gerstenblatt

Author:Julie Gerstenblatt
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-01-06T18:32:50+00:00

* * *

It is the same route she takes home whenever she brings a letter to the docks for Henry. Most recently, a week ago. One week and a lifetime ago, and still no further word from him. Anger rises in her—how dare he leave her and the children for so long without reasonable explanation and under such financial stress? Especially knowing their precarious financial situation! And then, to feel as if the whole town is talking about her husband behind Eliza’s back. He left Eliza lonely and vulnerable, which is precisely why she ran into the warm protection of another man’s arms.

Eliza wonders, not for the first time, whether Henry has been unfaithful, and what form that dalliance might have taken: a cosmopolitan woman in a faraway port, the mirror image of herself? An exotic beauty, the inverse of Eliza, from somewhere in the Pacific? Or—Lord help her for thinking it, but she knows some sailors do this very thing out of desperation or desire—lying with another man?

She used to think those were silly fears, unfounded and imaginary, like a child believing in monsters or ghosts. But now, after what she herself has done tonight, she acknowledges that it is possible—probable, even—that Henry has taken a lover.

But what good does it do to think of such a betrayal? She must live within the boundaries of the known world, or she will go mad. She is only inviting these terrible thoughts in order to even the score between them.

Henry’s hastily penned letter comes back to her now: My love, I am sorry to say that I am not yet able to return home to Nantucket this summer. There is still something I must do. Send love to the children and be strong for me.

Be strong! These words from a week ago are almost comical, for Eliza has been weak—weak in the knees, as her mother used to say about what love felt like—weakened by the strength of passion between her and James.

Eliza glances at the harbor on her right, where the full moon casts silver reflections on the water, and wonders, Henry, where are you and what are you doing there? When will you return to me? And, when you do, will you sense the distance created between us by this summer’s deceit?

Eliza reaches the heart of town, where the Straight Wharf ends and Main Street begins. It is getting close to eleven at night; she should pick up her pace, as the girls said they’d be home before midnight. The whale oil from two weeks ago must have been shipped out by now, and yet here lie thousands of tons more. Wooden casks made by local coopers line the docks.

Round-bellied and jolly, Eliza has always thought of those barrels. They are repositories for her hopes and dreams, the continued sale of them ensuring her content life. She taps one in a friendly hello as she passes, careful not to disturb these rows of sleeping liquid gold.

The rope walks and sail lofts, haylofts and taverns are shuttered for the night.

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